Ok, so it's past Christmas now and I can relax. I work New Years eve, so I don't much have to worry about celebrating it. I don't celebrate it much anyways. Same shit, different year. I like that the new year symbolizes a new beginning. Some people make resolutions that promptly fail with in the first week or two. Give them credit for trying, but it's always a doomed proposition that you are going to change because of a holiday rather than commit to a change that you desire more than anything.
Propose to have your priorities in order.
I don't plan to change much in the new year. Maybe some things, hardly anything noticeable. I like who I am, even when I don't. Sometimes I can't stand myself but that's when I have my most profound insights. Mainly because I don't have that veil of self-denial bullshit to shy me away from recognizing what it is that is troubling me, and facing the fact of just how unpleasant it's going to be to change. Either embrace unpleasant change, or shut the fuck up about suffering.
If 2008 taught me anything, it is that nobody cares when you're bitching. Really. If you're just bitching about something and not doing anything to better the situation, just what the hell are you really doing? Making everybody else miserable. So, if I bitch about something here, perhaps I should do something out in the world to offset it. Sounds like a lot of work though! Sad thing about bitching, it's easy. Doing something about it.... work. Lot's of it.
I'm like Lennon, I don't want to change the world. The problem is the world sucks. There are nice things, yeah. Dr. Pepper is nice. West End Pizza is nice. Sexy fat girls are REALLY nice! I guess the world is supposed to suck for a reason. It makes the few niceties we get that much more nice. Still though, There's far more crap in the world to make up for a few things we find pleasant to justify that rationale.
I think if we just realign our priorities, we would be surprised just how much it can help. Did you not get what you wanted for Christmas? Well, how about getting killed at work? That shit happens everyday and whether you want to believe it or not, dying at work is ALWAYS a possibility..... even if you work at some sickeningly happy place where everybody is so cheerful that you just want to puke. Chances are, that's where the next big office shooting is going to occur, so watch your back.
I have to learn to be happy with what I got. I mean, I got talent. I made this montage for my Saints Row 2 character named Clair Barker.
I got recognition from Bodacious Nicole at BODacious magazine.
As always, I got my sexy friends who think I'm great.
And, of course I have my wife who thinks I'm the cat's meow.
So really, what have I got to bitch about? The world is a shitty place, but big fucking deal, it sucks more for others than it does for me, so counting my blessing helps. God knows if I didn't have these things, I would work on changing that because I can't stand being miserable.
I have yet to meet someone who says "Misery? Let's have MORE of it! I can't be bummed enough!"
Well, people who won't outwardly admit it anyways. In the movie "The Matrix", The machines said that humans defined their existence by their misery. Is there truth to that? We are not truly alive unless we are suffering?
The times where I feel the most alive is when I'm happy and having a great time. Do I spend most of my time being miserable? I try not to. To some people, that's exactly how it looks. I'd resolve to change that, but I've already painted myself into a corner with the whole "New Years Resolution" thing, so maybe I'm better off to say that my attitude is something that continues to need work, and I have yet another year to work on it.
Happy new year, dear readers. Let's all work to make 2009 a better year for ourselves and each other.